A True Leaders Focus

 When I started working as a Television Producer in 2009, I started on a new journey in my media career. Starting new things is a common place for me because I seem to find my way to new ideas if they seem interesting. During a very difficult part of my life I gained the ability to be calm when I had trouble with something new or when things just weren't going my way. Media has always helped me buy giving me something to be hyper focused about.

I guess it was my way of coping with all that I had to deal with.  To me, personal issues can be the best or worst thing that happens to us. I think that tragic or just unfortunate situations can bring plenty of good things in the end. Not knowing who my father is, and having to grow up without a positive male figure, for me is the one thing that has really presented me the chance to be most optimistic.

I've had to learn how to be a man from many different sources. Some more reliable then others. My Mom, uncles, coaches, friends, music artist, movie stars, they all gave me something to take from their behavior. I've found lately that keeping a beginners mind with each day is the best way to stay open to the messages that are coming my way. The hardest part is deciding which message is good for me and which will destroy the foundation I've worked hard to build.


What are your sources for influence? What gives you the foundation your ethics and morals are built on. Who do you look to that gives you a good sense of a better you? If you don't have answers to these questions you should be concerned. Most of the things we have learned from our parents will only get us so far in life. Seeking expert advise on adult matters will determine how your life as an adult will turn out.

Before Kim and I got engaged I had to take a hard look at which influences I was using to help structure my life.  I wanted to marry her but I had reservations about marriage because I had no idea what it was even about. My mother just never sat me down and really broke that part of life down to me, so it was all new to me.

Long story short, I had managed to almost ruin another good relationship because I was ignorant to things like, honesty, integrity, respect, romance, health and overall just knowing your path and doing things the right way. I didn't want to let Kim go when things got rough, so I reached out and found Personal Life Media.  The best thing I took from grad school was the ability to find the patterns and answers to why those patterns exist. This has opened new doors and allowed me to begin searching for the real answers I needed. A few key words that come to mind are polarity, erotic vigilance and small offers.

Photo retrieved from http://personallifemedia.com

Personal Life Media provided me with adult education on issues like attraction, intimacy, marriage, dating and just little tidbits about how to carry myself as a reasonable man and be the ultimate leader. All of which we don't typically learn from our parents. Our parents help build our foundation but its up to us to build our adult minds and live to our full potential.

As an adult I feel like I'm more able to learn because I know what my weaknesses are and I'm OK with approaching a situation I may know nothing about. The hardest part was putting my ego aside and becoming comfortable with my current position. So if you're a female reading this, and you've always wondered why guys are either good in bed and suck at relationship or vice versa, then I'm sure you can find some answers in one of PLM's programs. I tried one of the free podcast before I decided which one I wanted to purchase.

I know this may seem off the chart but I've never really been about doing things the exact same way as everyone else. Take a look at the divorce rates...why would you? I saw personal life media programs as a way to shed light on all the failure  I had experienced in my past relationships with females. Whether it be intimate relationships or just everyday relationships. The science of women and men is very complex and warrants our full attention at all times.

So give the free podcast a chance. See if you can find the time to be honest with yourself and express a moment of true integrity within yourself and see if you can find that weakness you want to make your strength. I discovered things that we have been lied to about and only a select few men and women amongst us know.

These life secrets are now the center of my existence and allow me to have a foundation by which I make decisions as a man and a leader in my household. Again, ladies there is plenty there for you as well. Maybe even more than the guys. I ultimately believe that more women would enjoy the programs I've gotten from PLM. The information reveals things about the male and female anatomy that gives lite to mind blowing fact and relationship issues.

One of the most alarming things that I found out is that majority of men and women don't understand their bodies and mental make-ups. Which creates emotional and physical overloads and lack of communication. Half of the battle is knowing the facts and the other half is learning when and where to use them. You honestly may know most of what you already need to know to surviving in the monogamous relationship world. Deep down you just may not know how to apply it to being an adult.

My final point is that even if you don't use PLM at all, then I would hope you would research and try to understand better how to fullfill your many roles as an adult. I'll warn you that resistance on these issues will be vast and it may be something you well have to do on your own. People don't want to hear they are bad at relationship, their sexual skills need some work or their physical health plays into their sexual health. Being good at relationships is a learned skill as well as being a good lover and adult. Will you find your weakness and turn it into a strength?

Becoming The Leader I Was Meant To Be

Last month I got the chance to meet Pat Williams an icon in the sports world when it comes to leadership and management. Mr. Williams started out in baseball and worked his way to being a creator of the Orlando Magic Basketball Club. He was the GM for the Bulls and the Atlanta Hawks early on in his career, but now he is writing books on leadership and touring the world as a motivational speaker.

 I bumped into him at the Baseball Winter Meetings, Baseball Chapel Ceremony. It’s a breakfast event held every year at the winter meetings to promote the mission and vision of the Chapel. Pat has written over 70 books, and after listening to him speak I bought one of his latest, " The Leadership Excellence Devotional: The Seven Sides of Leadership in Daily Life."

I like to start and finish each day with The Lords Prayer. I sit up in the bed and spend a few minutes focusing on the gifts I have and what I still want to achieve in life. I say few words to send my love in any direction it may be needed, and ask for the patience and guidance I need to make it through tough times. Lately I have been asking for a clear vision that shows me how to be the leader I have the potential to be.

Leadership has become something I study and thrive to understand better each day. The vision has manifested itself through a more focused leadership roll between my wife and I, my work and many other aspects of my life. (More on my tools for a better relationship in another post.) The word leadership brings up so many questions I decided to put together a TV series all about it called "Leadership Summit."

After doing my first two interviews with Western Illinois University, Hall of Fame Softball Coach Holly Van Vlymen and Two time division II football National Champion coach, Bob Nielson. I started with coaches because I thought I'd be able to keep up with coaches on the subject of leadership. In those two interviews (which will premiere sometime this spring 2014) I learned in good detail, how deep the coaches love for leadership has to be. I'm still in the process of editing the programs and trying to digest all of the new information in them. I will definitely share the knowledge when I get it compiled.

In the mean time I had been asking for reliable daily resources I could get current leadership information to bring me up to speed on the language of the worlds best leaders. I found what I needed when I got the chance to met Pat Williams in Orlando back in December. He started his speech that day by confessing that he believes that God is the greatest leader the world has ever seen and that is who he strives to lead like.

This caught my interest because I hadn't heard leadership used this way before. It made me think of my Grandmother and all the hours we spent at church as a kid. She would always try to keep us on the straight and narrow. As of late, I don't have a church I can call home, but I do my best to keep my faith and live with a serving heart.

The book has a neat twist as it links bible scriptures to situations in business, sport or life. The book is set up to read one section a day and help build your leadership mind. It is sort of like me waking up each day and saying that prayer. It just gives me that sense that I have not and will not allow my shortcomings to keep me from my dreams.

If your looking for a vision of something you want to accomplish then write it clearly on paper, say it to a friend or to the God you worship. The saying "Prayer Changes Things" is not a joke. I've put all of my life goals on paper and did everything I could to make them happen. In most cases, I didn't see the path until I said the prayer and asked for the vision. Try it. It is just another way to keep your head up through it all.